Saturday, April 12, 2008

I Sometimes Struggle With the Nuances in Difference Between Irony and Simple (but, sometimes bizarre) Coincidence

We had such an exciting Saturday night - we spent the late afternoon recovering from naps (Laura and the boys did that, anyway), doing some work helping a team prep for trial (my activities), finalizing a grocery list, getting out to our favorite Mexican restaurant, and - the family activity that makes all the young/single/less-domesticated set SO envious of the family-types - WENT GROCERY SHOPPING.

It was wonderful, and that's not the least bit laced with sarcasm. When compared to the chaos and disruption I've endured the past week, coupled with Laura's sole-practitionering of the boys, it was so welcomed to just spend time as a family doing family things and running around together.

We did the bulk of our shopping tonight at the Meijer in Avon, our typical haunt for 90% of our grocery needs. After approximately an hour of dodging inconsiderate douchelords parking where they shouldn't park, cutting you off in the aisles, and traipsing about like they were the only pixies in fairyland, we had a pretty uplifting moment experiencing the kinder, more considerate side of human nature. As Laura was digging out coupons and interacting with the check-out guy, I held Kian and maneuvered our cart to the side of the check-out lane (as an aside here, the girl doing the bagging badgered us for our YET UNEMPTIED CARTS no less than 4 times, before she'd even filled a single grocery bag with our items!!! GAAAAAHHH!!!). Of course, I still haven't learned the lesson that our typical check-out lane at Meijer is directly in front of the store's penny ponies, and game machines; and, accordingly, I need to bring in at least a quarter's worth of pennies to satiate the boys' need for mechanical equestrianism. So, right on que, Kian starts reaching for the ponies and saying, "Daddy, I horsey I horseeeeeyyyyyyyy!!!!" And, of course, Daddy has to respond, "Sorry, Kian, I didn't bring in change with me."

Well, one of the Meijer cashier supervisors/staff members oversees all this and walks by me and says, "Sir, I think I have a penny I can give you, hang on."

She walks into the front office, and emerges holding a penny in her hand, and I'm able to put Kian on the horse. The whole time he's riding, I'm bouncing trying to psycho-kinetically get the ride over with, because Jackson's adequately distracted by Laura and her check-out procedure.

So, anyway, while I wasn't fully successful in avoiding Jackson's realization his brother was riding when he wasn't, the situation was quickly and easily defused, and we left the store. Our final stop of the night was to be at Sam's Club, a bit east on Rockville Road, just inside 465. The drive over there is what somewhat inspired this posts' title.

As you approach Sam's from the west, you can make the initial entrance to the store's parking lot on a quick merge into a turn lane that evolves from an exit ramp from northbound 465. As we duck into that lane, I look up and see the funeral home that's been in business there for, oh, I'd say at least 10 years now - maybe more, maybe less. I say to Laura, "Man, every time I see that place, I start to feel bad for people that are new to the area, or for some other reason, unfamiliar with this area's history."

"Why?" Laura asks.

I reply, "Well, that building in which the funeral home now operates used to be a Frisch's Big Boy when it was initially built. Then, it closed down, sat vacant for a bit, then the funeral home opened up. Wouldn't you be pissed if you died, and your relatives set up your funeral in that place, and you find out it used to be a Big Boy?"

She just laughed and shook her head in her normal, "You're a damned fool," way.

But really, think about it. If you died, and your family/friends/loved ones arranged your final hurrah in a building that used to be home to greasy burgers, fries, and questionable salad bar content, wouldn't you be slightly upset? Particularly if you didn't learn of the cosmic clowning you were enduring until you were beyond, in the ethereal plane? Seriously, I'd come back to haunt some people with the quickness! I'd spook them with some stuff like, "Did you ask for a combo meal with my headstone and casket, you jerks!?!?!?!"

Ha ha ha...anyway, I don't know if either irony or coincidence are the correct terms for that situation. More likely, it should just be chalked up to the fact that I'm a damned fool most of the time. Meh.

(K)

2 comments:

Sara said...

I always think the exact same thing...but I was already planning your funeral there. Is that a problem?

KLJK said...

you're out of the will.